Waiting for the baby

My bundle of joy arrived in a blue blanket

2008-05-11T14:47:00.003+08:00

I reached the hospital on 7th morning. For the first time in my life I reached on time for something. I dressed up in operation suit and they did a final check of blood pressure etc. Then I sat with my mother and waited while hubby and my dad went to do the paper works.

Time hardly passed until it was 9 am and we were taken near the operation theatre by a porter. It was time for me to go inside. I was told that hubby would join me later inside the theatre. I kissed my parents good-bye but didn't say anything to hubby because I was to meet him inside.
I was in the preperation room adjoining the operation theatre for quite sometime doing what, I do not remember.

In the operation theatre finally, I was given the epidural and they were monitoring other things for a long time. I was feeling very sleepy may be because of the epidural or the blinding bright lights or the cold conditioned air. I was feeling awful. I wanted hubby near me. I kept asking the nurses about my husband. They said he was waiting outside and will be with me in a short while. I missed him terribly and felt so bad that I had not kissed him good-bye too. I was afraid that he was going to miss the delivery and I would deliver my baby without kissing my hubby.

His arrival after so long a time was a blessing for me. I told him whatever I had done since leaving him, that my blood pressure reached a peak of 160/100 and that I vomitted. A screen was then raised with me and hubby on one side and my belly on the other. And then the doctors and nurses were doing so many things, which I was not feeling. There was lots of pushing and rolling motions in my tummy. And there was one final puuuu.......................sh..... and there was the baby. The doctor raised the baby over the screen to show us, he was there, crying.

I do not remember what happened after that. All I could remember was the little one raised above my head, crying. They sent hubby out of the room and I could still hear the baby's crying. I laid there awestruck. Then they brought the baby to me, wrapped in a blue blanket and put him on me. He was looking at me and crying... hearing which I couldn't help crying myself.

Baby's weight: 3 kg

38 weeks

2008-05-03T13:43:00.002+08:00

I went for the 38 weeks appointment, probably the last prenatal appointment before delivery. The doctor did a final check if the baby has turned and confirmed that he hasn't. Later we got things finalized like signing the forms of consent and for hubby to stay with me and witness the delivery.
My appointment for the c section is 9.30 am on the 7th of may. I would need to reach the hospital 2 hours earlier for the admission procedures.
Things are settled now. I have a bag to bring to the hospital and it was packed a month earlier. It contains clothes for me and the baby (freshly cleaned) even though the hospital staff told me that all I would need to bring is going home dress for me and baby. Still I have my personal clothes packed - just in case.

37 weeks

2008-04-27T13:53:00.000+08:00

My breech baby is still very active on contrary to everything others have said. People say that the movements reduce slightly as days go on but my baby is more active everyday because he is not locked in his birth position and unable to move. This is kind of fun too. Most often I think that I am gonna miss all his maneuvers after his birth. After all I am the only one who can feel all this and after his birth, I would have to share this with everyone else. He would no longer be mine alone. Everyone would want to hold him then. I'll really look forward to steal him away whenever time will permit.

36 weeks

2008-04-20T10:45:00.004+08:00

I went for my next appoinment yesterday. One week of thinking and rethinking and getting used to the idea had made me quite cheerful. And I had made up my mind about the c-section.

"Do you think the baby has turned yet?" started the doctor. No. I don't think so.

But I'm fine though. Then we had an U/S done. The baby was about 2.7 kgs. By the time he arrives, he would be 3.5 kgs that is in 3 weeks time. We are all excited in anticipation of the big boy!

Sno......ring...

2008-04-15T10:46:00.002+08:00

A couple of weeks back, hubby woke me up in the night to tell that I was snoring. I said "NO". I couldn't believe it. Me? Snoring? It was much of a shame. And then it started happening everynight. We had a deal. We would let each other know while snoring. We hope it would help us stop the habit.

Few days later, even I started feeling it. Whenever hubby woke me up, I would notice my own snoring just before waking up. Sometimes I even make that noise during the day while I laugh or walk fast. It is because of shortness of breath.

I checked with the doctor and learnt that it is quite normal. Only hope that it will go off after delivery.

Baby's position!

2008-04-09T16:21:00.009+08:00

I am 34 weeks now and I went for a growth scan yesterday. I had loads of questions for my doctor and was expecting her to give me a sigh of relief saying that the baby has 'engaged' already even though I do not feel any difference at all. For the past couple of days, I was feeling the baby had slightly moved down, even though he would climb back up every now and then. Which I know is definitely a sign that the baby has not engaged yet. Still I preferred to believe he had!!!
The very first look into the scan revealed that the baby is still breech. I got a bit worried even though it is only 34 weeks now and he still has enough time to turn. Only the previous day, I had learned about this girl whose baby was breech and is expecting to have a c-section soon. Rest of the scan went fine.
The moment the doctor saw the scan report, she said that the baby has got a big head (head is bigger than the rest of the body). It need not be a cause of concern still, we might need a c-section. Well, in her words, I'll most probably have a c-section. And the breech position? It was only then she saw the rest of the report and said in that case, I'll definitely have a c-section.
We can't deliver our breech baby normally because of his big head. If we try, his head might get stuck while the rest of the body has come out already. That is too risky to even try!
While fighting back my tears, I asked her about chances of ECV or external cephalic version. She said she doesn't personally suggest doing it because of the risks involved and if I insist on doing one.... no I don't. It's upto you, doctor!!!
I couldn't hold my tears beyond this. Having a c-section was the last thing I would have ever thought about in life. As long as I can remember, whenever I had to do something painful, I have always thought "Some day I am gonna have a baby through normal delivery. If I can handle that, I can handle this too". This has been in my thoughts all the time. Starting from little needle pricks to donating my blood for charity! Now the very reason for all my confidence is gone!
The doctor was trying to convince me. She said that even with a c-section, I can be awake the whole time and see the baby coming out. And I can have my husband with me. Well, I did not listen to what else she told me.
"Talk to your baby and let's see if he would engage by himself!" was the last thing she said. Hmm. Let's see. If the baby hadn't moved down at all, I would have hoped for the best. Now, I feel he is lower than he used to be but head up. Which I think is because he just couldn't engage, possibly because of his head. There's nothing I can do alright. When I asked the doctor about spending time on all fours to encourage the baby to engage, she said she didn't believe it will help, but I can try if I want to. Well, I shall try!

Things that keep me alive today:

The baby's kicking has increased in the past few days. I'm happy that he is more active regardless of the fact that he is kicking my bladder with his legs often and this is making me too uncomfortable and wanting to pee often!
Hubby, who has been wonderful all the way.

33 weeks

2008-03-31T11:37:00.003+08:00

For all the pain, sleep deprivation and swelling, I still enjoy being pregnant. I'm happy with every passing day. My food intake is in full power. Still I feel myself fit enough. So far, I have gained about 13 kgs including the baby's weight and the swollen fluid in my legs.
The best part of pregnancy is the massage that I get from hubby, anytime, anywhere. He doesn't mind giving me a massage whenever I ask which is amazing.
The worst part is he wouldn't allow me to take caffeine in any form. And he controls the amount of butter I take. If I had coffee one day, then he won't let me have either coke or coffee for another 2 weeks. Even if I tell him that 300 ml per day of caffeine contained drink is safe for a normal and pregnant being. Good news is this restriction excludes the caffeine in chocolate, which I eat anyway without his knowledge. Even if he knew, I'd tell him that chocolate contains iron and magnesium that's vital for the baby. For the baby, you know!
P.S.Along with the shopping lists for the baby, I am also preparing another list of things to do after delivery. On top of the list is "dance till I drop, jump all I can". Because that is one this I miss most in being pregnant!

30 weeks

2008-03-10T11:26:00.004+08:00

I can no longer sleep peacefully. It's not just about the position I'm gonna sleep in. But the baby moves to the upper part of the belly when I lie down and cause severe pain near my rib case. I'm having to wake up and walk a little before the baby moves back down and then go to sleep again.
In addition to the body ache, my legs have started to swell these days. Initially it was so different carrying around some extra fluid above my feet. There is a slight pain in the area. And none of my footwear fit me anymore.
Thought footwear with straps are not the perfect choice for someone with as big a belly like me, those are the only lifesavers. I adjust the straps according to the smount of swelling.
Walking does affect the swelling, the more I walk, the more swollen my feet are. The doctor asked me not to stop walking or swimming. Raising the legs high when I sit helps reduce the pain. Soaking my feet in cold water definitely does magic. With 10 minutes of soaking, the swelling is almost gone but unfortunately this is just a temporary relief. Walk around the house for 5 minutes and the swelling returns.
I have made this a routine. I keep my legs high whenever I sit. If I sit in between a walk, stretch my legs, calf muscles and exercise my foot as much as possible. Helps a lot with the pain. Before bed time, I take a warm shower using hot water for the back. And then soak my legs in cold water for 10 minutes. This part is especially boring so I make sure that I have some work for my hands. I either read or moisturize my hands, face and tummy.

hic hic hiccups......

2008-03-05T11:11:00.001+08:00

We were getting ready for bed when I thought I felt something near the bottom of my belly.
A kick? No. A twist? NO. It was more different like little taps. No, the baby can't be tapping with his fingers so rythmically and so fast!
It can't be heart beat because the baby's heart rate is supposed to be more than 140. This series of taps was slower than my own heart beat. The what was it?
Thanks to all the websites I have read. So far I have been thinking that I was the only preggo whose unborn baby didn't hiccup. Now he does. Oops my baby is hiccuping. What am I supposed to do? Get tensed and flutter around? But I am truly amazed by the improvement. Because I had read that hiccups are not just a normal sign but also a good sign that the baby is alright.

Detailed scan

2008-02-26T11:05:00.001+08:00

Its week 29 and we had a detailed scan done today. I could see the baby's face. It looked so clear. I thought I could even see the baby's nose well. If what I thought was right, the baby has got his father's well proportioned nose and not my broad ugly nose. It was a nice baby face picture and not the usual scan image. But no! I don't trust my own eyes these days. May be hubby was right. My pregnancy harmones have worked too well and makes me over estimate the baby all the time. So I looked at hubby's face for approval. And he looked as amused as I was and gave me the same surprised look. Could it be just an illusion?
We din't dare ask the doctor if what we were seeing was true. So we pretended it was our own baby's face. The scan technician didn't give us a film of that image. But I still remember that face.

28 weeks

2008-02-18T15:56:00.005+08:00

I have been busy window shopping for the baby. My mom has visited us here. When hubby is at office, mom and I would go around hunting for baby items listing and decided what to buy and where. I shall finish deciding things before next week and push the real shopping until after 34 weeks.
My body ache has started taking over and I am overly tired these days. Every evening I have a phase when I no longer can do anything, sit stand or even talk. I am too tired even to move during these times. Which ofcourse can be avoided by taking a nice afternoon's nap and a warm shower. I try taking a shower after full tiredness has set in as I have no habit of sleeping during the day.

26 weeks

2008-02-11T15:50:00.003+08:00

I have been feeling the baby's movement from outside too by seeing and placing my hand over the belly. Anyone can see and feel it. But since hubby was taken ill for the past 2 weeks, he couldn't. And I decided not to tell anyone else until hubby feels it first. We waited for so long before hubby was perfectly well. But when he did feel, that kick was nothing like the ones before. May be the baby specially prepared to show his father his presence. Baby crawled under my belly and we could actually see him or some part of him move about 2 inches. It was so much fun.

Looking at the live action

2008-01-21T15:19:00.003+08:00

I was sitting in the couch today working on my computer while hubby was watching TV. Suddenly I saw a movement in my belly. I saw, not just felt. It was a kick or twist, I'm not sure. I saw.
I couldn't yet call hubby for I don't trust my own eyes now-a-days. And then there was another. In the same spot. So I called hubby and asked him to keep looking at my belly. Poor hubby, he tried his best for quite some time before quitting. Probably the baby went to sleep!

23 weeks

2008-01-18T14:50:00.003+08:00

I have started feeling the baby regularly. Still for every slightest movement, I freeze. And sometimes shout for hubby to share the little excitement. This doesnt exclude public places like the train or the bus.

21 weeks

2008-01-07T14:47:00.003+08:00

The baby has started moving quite regularly though there is a day every now and then when I cannot feel a thing. Especially on busy days. Otherwise I am enjoying every moment of it with pleasure and even took some pride in being the only one to feel the baby for real!

20 weeks detailed scan

2008-01-03T14:53:00.005+08:00

It is about time to get my 5th month detailed scan done to check for congenital anomalies in the baby. Since I am still staying at my home town, we decided to get it dont at a local scan center.
The technician who took the scan was not very enthusiastic and was hesitant to answer my questions concerning the baby. Probably he is not used to women asking questions like me. What questions, you ask. Well I just asked him if I can have a look at my baby, if I can bring my husband and mother to the scanning room and what was the length of my baby. Tell me I am a nagger.
But these are information I found out from the report. The baby weighed about 440 gms which was the average weight of a baby of 21 weeks and 6 days age and not the 20 weeks and 3 days I was in. So my baby has grown 10 days more than his age. Hurray! I have done it by eating nothing but a guava everyday for the past 3 months.
The other details also suggested the same thing. Above all, the report said that my EDD by ultrasound is 10 days earlier than estimated according to LMP. Well, I am so happy that I've grown the baby very well.

It's New Year baby!

2008-01-01T13:27:00.001+08:00

It was New Year's eve and we were all in celebration mood. We are staying at my mother's and we went to attend a friend's party. I kept feeling a tap from the inside every now and then. I pretended that it was the baby and enjoyed every ~~moment~~ tap of it.
After dinner, we all went to enjoy the firecrackers outside. BOOM! blew a cracker with loud noise. That was all. All of a sudden, my whole inside seemed to respond. the little kickboxer within must have got scared at the noise. Or excited. Or just startled. Maybe.
He was moving and kicking with great speed. I couldn't take the noise anymore. So I moved to a safe distance from the noise and waited till the baby finally settled.
Thanks to the lullabys I had memorized, I sang to the baby and pretended that was the reason for his calming down. Then we all toasted to the baby, the newly moving baby, the New Year Baby.

Almost 20 weeks

2007-12-29T13:25:00.002+08:00

Sometimes I feel tiny weak taps from the inside of the belly, especially when im lying down. It feels like someone was tapping with a finger from the inside.
Whether or not it is the baby, I do not know. Only time should tell.

Little advanced

2007-12-24T13:22:00.002+08:00

Today my belly popped out a bit - all of a sudden. It really is an overnight effect. I can even feel the inside of my belly button, which is so soft and delicate.

17 weeks

2007-12-10T13:17:00.004+08:00

Nausea has almost disappeared. I'm afraid I can't say so. It still pops up every three days. But I'm not happy to see it go. Because I was relying on the daily nausea time to tell myself, the baby is just fine.
I haven't started feeling the baby yet, and I haven't started showing. So far, my belly has increased only 2 inches more than the pre-pregnancy measurement. Nausea has been my only pregnancy symptom so far. I wish I'll start feeling the baby before nausea goes off.

Hi there!

2007-12-08T13:14:00.002+08:00

Its 118 days and we went for the fourth scan. things were quite normal. But the first look into the scan showed the baby's hand - stretched from his body and flexed so it looked like he was waving - at me!

Well, may be he was just exercising his joints, the joints which we would now be able to move very well.

Knock Knock Who is in there?

2007-11-30T13:01:00.004+08:00

Its 110 days today and went for the third scan. Baby's face was more distinct. We could see the spot where eyes are supposed to be, shape of the nose and a mouth that opened and closed.
Yes, it opened and closed!
I assume that the baby was swallowing amniotic fluid, which I understand is normal. Which also means the baby would start peeing within my belly! Arms and legs were more distinct.

I have already fallen in love with my baby- my son! Yes, we saw a tiny weenie like structure between his legs.
Like every doctor, mine said that it's probably a boy. Probably? excuse me, it was really and truly there. I can say for sure!!! I even have a snapshot of the area.
Like every husband, mine believes there is a 70% chance that it is a boy, even if he sees the snapshot clearly.
And like every mom-to-be I know for sure that I am carrying my son, now that I have a proof!

15 weeks

2007-11-26T12:58:00.001+08:00

Nausea has started to wane again. But the tiredness is too hard to bear. I wish I would be able to atleast sit properly for sometime together. This must be the height of pregnancy sickness.

13 weeks: Nausea heightens again

2007-11-12T12:54:00.003+08:00

Last week the vacation went in peace. I even enjoyed a head, neck, shoulders and feet massage. We enjoyed this trip even though I was in bed rest for most of the time. But now, the nausea has increased a lot more and is worse than ever before. I assume it is the progesterone to blame!

Emergency

2007-11-08T11:16:00.006+08:00

We woke up quite early this morning in preparation to our babymoon as my nausea was in control. I was still feeling tired because of the pre-vacation shopping done the previous night. Hubby got up just before me and started preparing for the trip when I noticed I had slight spotting. I felt like the whole world was collapsing even though I know that a little spotting is normal for some pregnant women. For some women! Should that mean me too?
We rushed to the emergency room at once. Not to mention that we felt like killing the attendant who made us wait for so long before letting us meet the doctor. Hubby made a point to tell the nurse over and over that his wife was pregnant and she was spotting!!!
The doctor took it casually, did a scan and informed the baby is fine. He asked if I did something remarkable the previous day. Yeah, the shopping. I started at about 2 pm and returned home only after 10 pm. I was walking all day. He asked me to rest for a week and not to strain the body. He said it was fine to continue with the vacation plan if we were going to relax. Ofcourse we went to relax.
He also put me on progesterone, to stabilize the pregnancy just in case. So there we went on to our fourth honeymoon, which we know might be the last one before we'll be carrying the baby around whereever we went. And this would be the only vacation that we stay indoors most of the time.
P.S. Before leaving the doctor's office, I peeked at the scan machine which still had the image of the baby and the reading which said the baby is 6.1 cm long. That is 1.3 cm more than last week. Way to go my baby!

Showing signs

2007-11-07T17:05:00.005+08:00

I went to the store to buy new bras as the pre-pregnancy ones were getting uncomfortable. Just by seeing me the store keeper found out that I am pregnant and suggested buying maternity bras which would provide extra comfort.

Oh come on. I'm just 8 weeks along and she found out just by looking at me! Well, it's all my bloated stomach. It has been this way even a week before I found out my pregnancy. I wouldn't be able to eat anything during the day and for dinner, whatever I eat shows up high in my belly. I'm sure I looked like 5 months pregnant whenever I had a heavy meal, thats almost every night. None of the medicines that the doctor prescribed would work.

12 weeks: Nausea in control

2007-11-05T12:50:00.003+08:00

I'm 12 weeks along and nausea seems to be in control already. I have only morning sickness and surprisingly some days are perfectly normal. This makes me tensed at times. I am worried about the baby being fine since there is no other way of knowing the pregnancy is going on alright!

Looks like a baby!

2007-10-31T16:46:00.005+08:00

Today is 80th day LMP and we visited the doctor for 2nd visit. We had another scan to check with the baby. He/she has already developed arms and legs and is floating in the fluid and shaking his/her legs and arms. It actually looks like 'swimming around'.
The baby is 4.8 cm/2in long.

8 weeks

2007-10-02T04:38:00.005+08:00

Nausea has set in last week and has been increasing everyday. I actually threw up my salad and do not want to think of anything vegetable anymore. Nevertheless, I'd vomit everyday.

But I'll do just good with fruits. I have stocked up the refrigerator with enough fruits to satisfy my extra human hunger!

First look

2007-09-30T04:07:00.002+08:00

Today is 48th day LMP and also the first time, we saw the little being growing inside me.

We visited the doctor for the first time and she suggested we do a scan to make sure the baby is ok. We could see the baby's heart. It was beating in nice rythmic pattern.... even though it was just a mass of cells sticking to the wall of the uterus.

I feel nauseated every morning. Still managing with salads and fruits.

Week 5

2007-09-23T15:54:00.003+08:00

I have been too hungry lately. I can't believe because its hardly a week since we found out about the pregnancy and I am already showing symptoms. I have even started taking lots of fruits and vegetables. I start my day with salads....

Letting him know

2007-09-17T15:24:00.003+08:00

When the clinic attendant told me news, I didn't know what to do. For that was the last thing I expected anyone to say to me, now. I guess I was shaking.

She asked me if I was scared.

No! I'm just.. excited. This part should have come out too loud. I saw faces around staring at me. She sent me off fixing an appoinment 2 weeks later and advising me not to walk fast and long and not to go in crowds because I will catch a cold. So as I was leaving I walked too slowly that someone could have thought I had a fracture in my legs. Whatif I hurt the baby by walking?

Outside, I took a taxi to hubby's office. The moment the taxi started off, hubby called on my phone. Well, this is a problem with couples who share everything. He knew I must be out of the clinic and wanted to know. I didn't take the call. I wanted him to believe that I was still talking to the doctor. He called again. I still ignored.

When I reached his office, I went over to the security and asked him to give a call to a person I wanted to meet. He asked why I couldn't call myself. Only then I realized I was holding my phone in my hand. Well, there's not enough credit left to make a call. He looked bewildered and offered his phone so I could call.

Dammit! Why don't these security guys understand my impatience to break a big news to my husband and help me do it right???? I thanked him but I could sms from my handphone.

I smsed hubby that I was waiting in front of his office. Was thas stupid? But what else could I do? After a few moments, I saw him all smiles in his face.

Wait. Why smile? He was supposed to be worried about me.

Or. Did I show something in my face?

He said "What?"

"What 'what'? Nothing!"

"Yeah?????" So he knew. That's a surprise busted.

"Yeah"

Then we didn't talk. Or we talked. Or rather I do not remember what happened!!!!

I'm sure I didn't faint!

So, I'm pregnant!

2007-09-17T12:20:00.003+08:00

I was missing my period for more than a week. And I was busy thinking about what kind of deadly sickness I could be having. No, I can't be pregnant.

Then I knew.. I must be having cyst problems... or whatever those problems are called. There, I waited to visit the doctor on a monday only to realize I had pain in my abdomen. Again I knew what it was. My appendix!!! (Excuse me! Isn't this where the appendix is?) I dreaded at the thought of myself having Appendicitis and now this useless organ of my body needs to be removed. Oops. Why do they ever have organs that do not contribute to anything in the body?

And still I went to the gyno. For all I have prepared!

The doctor was on leave... When I told what my problem was, the attendant insisted I take a pregnancy test.

Why? I can't be pregnant!!!

No, you could be! Why? Wouldn't you want to keep the baby?

What?!?! I definitely will. If.it's.a.baby. But how can I be?

But I gave up. And as the attendant was looking at the pregnancy test kit, I couldn't help thinking "There! You have wasted my $25 on an unwanted test!!"

Well! But it showed. The pink line... It was really and truly there. And you can imagine how it was like to me!

Hmm... So, I'm pregnant!

Initial signs?

2007-09-11T13:24:00.003+08:00

We ate out tonight. When we came back home, my tummy was so heavy and big. Well, I have never been a slim chick, but I've been known to have a flat tummy as long as I remember. Today my tummy could have easily passed for a 5 months pregnant woman. It has been like this for the past 1 week. But today's was worst. I stood in front of the mirror tapping my belly and asked hubby jokingly if he thought I was pregnant. He scolded me for being so carefree for things like this and said we should visit a doctor if this doesnt change.